Building Strength

   Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall, but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. Isaiah 40: 28-31

Earlier today I saw a post that stated that today is winter solstice and it will be the darkest day. But, tomorrow the light begins coming back. I feel like that is just like my strength. The time coming out of the hospital has been full of hope and sadness. I am realizing that the unplanned solitude of October, November, and some of December has been building muscles that sometimes we don't realize are necessary. I call where I am now my miracle story, and what I am realizing is that the miracle continues as I sit with God and listen. It wasn't just about not dying but about what LIFE will be. It is about seeing if I will be able to do everything I desire and dream to do, walk, lift weights, clean my house in one day and so much more. The strength to do these things is not coming back all at once. I have had to wait and practice patience. 

I know patience is a bad word to most of us, probably because we are becoming more and more accustomed to getting things when we want them and not being inconvenienced. But, that isn't how the kingdom of God works. We are not on our own timing we are on God's timing and schedule. Sometimes a "suddenly" will happen that we weren't even expecting, which means change has come without any time to prepare.  But, much of the time we are waiting and that can seem painful and long. We can believe that God is not going to come through. But, in Isaiah, it says that they that wait upon the Lord will or shall renew their strength. They will mount up on wings like eagles, they will run and not be weary; they will walk and not faint.

That is what has been happening to me. I have been waiting with God for the next step, but, in the solitude of it all, God has been making me stronger so that in this next season I do not grow weary. The obstacles that will come my way do not cause me to faint or shrink back. Even the words of others won't sway me because I have a source of strength that is out of this world. I am learning that the reason I can do hard things has nothing to do with me and everything to do with the source I am leaning on, holding on to and that is God and His word.